You Can't Do That?! I still hate you Holly.

At one point in time, not so long ago actually, I worked at a nursing home. We had a great team of people and I really enjoyed my job and then Holly was hired. I hated Holly from the moment I met her. I am not sure why to this day, although I have some ideas as to why. Maybe it's because she was ugly? Maybe it's because she was slow? Maybe it's because she is a whiny ass bitch, yep come to think of it that was probably why.
Anyway, I might have let it go had she of not told on me to management and didn't get me written up for no stinking reason. If there is one thing I hate it's a tattle tale, but this fight started way before this happened. One day when I was working on the same hall as her she decided to not help me with a patient that took 2 people to lift. As we were the only two on that hallway, I had to go beg someone else on a different hall to help me because she is fat and lazy. So after hunting down someone to help me I decided I needed to play on her emotional state to really piss her off, thus winning the game. I knew Holly didn't have any friends at work, and I knew I did. I also knew that she wanted more than anything to be liked by everyone, fat chance (ha ha ha I said fat and she was fat) as I didn't like her and neither did anyone else. So I went home that night and plotted my revenge.
Knowing that she had a serious need to be liked and knowing that she loved Harry Potter, I hatched a perfect plan. When I got to work the next day I made sure to inform my cohorts of my plan, thus insuring that this would not and could not be messed up in anyway. During the day one by one in front of her, I started asking if my coworkers would like to come to my house to have a Harry Potter movie night the next week. Every single one of them said sure, and we talked about loudly and exclaimed at how much fun it would be to hang out after work and just relax. I would also inform that person that everyone else would be there as well. Holly would just stand there and stare, waiting like a puppy dog to be invited to my party. I would just smile, an obnoxious smile, but still a smile and say, " Hey Holly, do you want to ... pause... take out the trash tonight or start final rounds?". I would always ask a stupid question just to get her hopes up and then squash them like a little bug walking across my counter. It made me so happy to watch her stupid face get all excited and then fall like I just said her grandma died. I am pretty sure this makes me an awful person, but she had it coming. So after doing this multiple times with multiple people she finally got the hint she wasn't invited and never would be. The best part of the plan was that there wasn't going to be a party, we all worked second shift so a party after work was definitely not possible and we all had different nights off as well. So if Holly wasn't so stupid she would have realized that it wasn't possible for us to all be able to have the same night off to have a Harry  Potter movie party, but she is.
The next day the big, fat, tattle tale apparently went and talked to the higher ups complaining in her whiny ass way that I didn't invite her to my party and it hurt her feelings. Whhhaaaaaa! Somebody call the whaaaambulance. So about halfway through my shift I get called into the office, and I knew I was in trouble but wasn't really sure why, as I wasn't exactly the model employee. I got bored quite easily and found ways to entertain myself, but that is besides the point. I never even considered that Holly might be that childish and ridiculous to actually go to our bosses and whine. Well, I was wrong. So I go into the office and across from me sits the director of nursing, the assistant director of nursing and the human resources representative, FANTASTIC. All I could think was, shit what did they catch me doing this time? So they asked me why I thought I was there and after pondering all the reasons I could have been there, I decided the wisest course of action was to say nothing. If there was one thing I learned in childhood it was to never admit to anything, it has done me well thus far. So I of course replied that I couldn't imagine what I was doing here, maybe I was getting a raise. Well if nothing else that elicited a chuckle response from the peanut gallery of idiots. Directly following the stupid chuckle was, " No that's not why you are here", well damn. So again I repeated, " I have no idea". The director of nursing then spoke up and informed of why I was there. She told me and I quote, " You are here because you intentionally hurt Holly's feelings by planning a party and not inviting her. She came in here earlier today crying because she feels that no one likes her.". She paused and waited for me to say something, nothing that I had to say would have done me any good and probably would have only served in digging my own grave. My response would have gone like this; wow, it's really too bad that Holly doesn't have friends and that I didn't want to invite her to my party, but I don't like her and she is a tattle tale, now that I am aware of her being a tattle tale I will tease her mercilessly. Yeah it probably wouldn't have gone over well, so I kept it to myself and gave her a blank look instead.  Well apparently I didn't give her a blank look and was informed that the statement she made was nothing to be smirked at or mocked. Again, I said nothing. The one sided conversation went on after my smirking, mocking, rude demeanor. I was informed that I was going to be written up and disciplined for not allowing Holly to come to my party. That was when I couldn't stand it anymore and was so flustered at the ridiculousness of this entire conversation that the only thing I could say was, "You can't do that". She replied that she most certainly could, I thought I was going to die. I was then asked to sign the write up and I declined to do so and decided a speech was in order at this point. I had so many things come into my mind to say at that moment and right there I began digging a huge grave for them to push me in and bury me. It went a little like this.
"You can't do that, this is bullshit. You can't write me up because I didn't invite Holly to a damn party that is at MY HOUSE. You don't get to decide who I invite, even if I purposely invited every single one of them right in front of her face. She needs to stop being a whiny baby and just get over the fact that I hate her. If she wasn't so stupid, ugly and lazy, maybe I would have invited her to my imaginary party. Yep, that's right I made the party up to piss her off. I hate her enough that I would do that, and I will do it again and again. This is so ridiculous. So RIDICULOUS! Fine I will sign your stupid write up, even though it's asinine. Ha! There I signed the damn thing. This is crazy. You are crazy, you are all crazy."
I realized right after I said it, I was now in more trouble. She informed me that they would be keeping an eye on me and they were going to put Holly and I on a hall together until we could learn to be friends. HA HA HA... friends? NEVER! So I went home that night fuming. I tried to go to sleep that night, but it just wasn't going to be possible until I had hatched yet another plan to get back at that bitch. I laid there and thought about what was said, and wasn't said at that meeting. What was said was that we were going to have to work on a hall together until we were able to be friends, work on a hall together that gives me a fabulous idea. I was pretty good friends with one of the nurses there and she didn't like Holly anymore than I did, mostly because Holly was lazy and cut corners. The next day when I arrived at work I checked the list and we were on a hall together, but the nurse on this hall was exactly the one I wanted to pull off my wonderful payback plan. As the day closed I took the perfect opportunity to begin my fabulous plan. We did our bed checks and each one of us were responsible for one side of the hall. We had to make sure that bed rails were up, mats were down on the floor and alarms were attached to those patients who needed them because they wandered time to time. After bed checks were completed, Holly took out the trash. While Holly was gone I went down her side of the hall and unattached her alarms and then waited (no patients were harmed in this plot). The nurse always does the final bed check before we leave. Right on cue when Holly returned the nurse went down our hallway checking every room to make sure that everything was done before we left. The nurse went into her first room with a patient that required an alarm and called Holly in immediately to inform her that she had forgotten an alarm and told her she would let this one go as long as she didn't find any other problems with her side of the hallway. In the next room the nurse found yet another alarm off, and informed Holly she would have to write her up. I have never been so happy, then I was at that moment. I walked next to Holly and quietly said, " You are a tattle tale and if you really wanted friends you should have thought about that before you got me written up for some stupid bullshit. Pay backs really are a bitch aren't they? I will make your life hell from now on unless you tell the director that we are now the best of friends and all of our problems are solved. If you don't I will continue working on getting you fired. There is no way that you can prove that I took those alarms off and now you are screwed. Enjoy that write up, it's way more serious than being written up because I made you cry. By the way, why would you cry over something so ridiculous? Are you a woman or a child? I am guessing child, and I think you need some serious psychological help. Have a horrible night, and remember, screw with me and I will pay you back ten times worse. Now to go hell.
She never messed with me again, and she did exactly what I told her to the next day. Moral of the story... Holly is a stupid, whiny, tattle tale. NEVER WORK WITH FAT GIRLS NAMED HOLLY. THEY ARE BIG WHINY TATTLE TALES WHO DESERVE TO BE TORTURED. I still can't believe that you can get written up for not inviting someone to your own party at your house. Bullshit, I tell you, bullshit.